The Adventures of Katie Bonk!

A bit of advice based on a few of my life experiences thus far:

• Do not "try to make the yellow light" on a left-hand turn in the rain. You may end up doing a 180 and facing a school bus head-on in traffic.
• Do not believe your father when he tells you that fried okra tastes like popcorn. It does not.
• Do not listen to your sister when she says the dryer will be a fun hiding place. She will close the door and leave you alone; and, if you're lucky, she won't turn it on.
• If a dog acts like she is going to bite your behind, you should remove yourself from the yard immediately. Because she will make contact the second time, and it will hurt tremendously.
• Do have a beer or two at Carowinds, and then ride the Borg Assimilator to increase maximum fun-ness.
• Do take a long road-trips with friends if the opportunity is available. Who knows, you may come home with a HUGE WIN OVER MICHIGAN.
• Do not live with a sorority girl if you are unsure of the Greek system and the stories you've heard. Most likely, they are all true.
• Do not stick with a major in college if you don't like it. Even if you change it as late as the second semester of your junior year. You probably won't have to go to school for too much longer, and you'll get a degree in something much more suited to you.
• Do not believe your mother when she tells you that ringing the doorbell over and over again will burn the house down. It will not. She just doesn't want you doing it
• Do not wear 4-inch heels to a coliseum-type building. Those stairs are steep and smaller than the average step.
• Do not let a crazy cat who attacks and stalks you keep you from staying with your man. The cat will calm down one day. And that guy? The one who pulls said cat out from under your chair and gets 20 claws and a mouthful of kitty teeth in his arm? He's a pretty good guy.
  

And finally...

• Do not set up friends with family or vice versa in the romantic way. You will always choose the family's side when the relationship ends, and you will lose a good friend without ever hearing a reason why.